You know something. I'm kinda suprised. There are people out there that actually do know some things about me. They actually know how I feel on some issues and why I do some of the things I do and how I am in general. I had never thought that anyone did.*Aside from a particular person I somewhat had this conversation with earlier.
Have any of you few readers, and by few I mean like three (that I'm aware of,) ever noticed my maturity level? Because I feel that it is higher than iI act at school. It's lower there because I get left out otherwise and I hate being left out. But when I'm at home or at someone else's house and we're talking about kinda important stuff, sometimes I feel like I get kinda deep into what I say. Now, this doesn't always happen, mind you, but it does tend to now and then.
*This is going to be a very sketchily written blog. I'm tired, but feel the need to write something, so I'll kinda be jumping over things.*
Here's something that REALLY IRRITATES ME! Oh my gosh! You do something and you think that it's just something for fun and games and then someone get's really mad at you. Ok. And then they WON'T TELL YOU ANYTHING! Ok, so what am I supposed to do. I just hurt you in some way and don't know how I did. WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME! Or when someone you know has a problem against you and your character and they won't tell you why they don't like you or what that itch is in their side. Ok, so if you have a problem with me, why won't you tell me so that I can fix it in some way to make you feel better?
What's the point in keeping these things to yourself? Really, they don't help the world turn smoother in ANY way. AT ALL.
What bugs me the most is that it's really easy, or kinda easy, for me to get a gist of how people feel towards me. Whether they like me, hate is easy, whether they have and itch against me. So it's really annoying when they WON'T tell me a thing.
Wouldn't you find that annoying?
Oh arg! You know something that really annoys me. I'm too empathetic. I care too much about other people. I take on others problems and make them my own and worry and freak our and stress about things I shouldn't. But I do. I feel bad saying that I care too much about other people..
But it's true. I do deeply care about other people. Want to know what my reason is for going to university? To get an education that I can put back into the world so that I can help people in some way become better people or make the world a better place in which to live. That's the point, my reason and drive. Other than that, I don't see a point in going to school. That's the point of an education to me and that's what I intend to see it through to the end as.
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Because I feel that it is higher than I act at school. It's lower there because I get left out otherwise and I hate being left out.
ReplyDeleteJessi, this seems to imply that in order to be accepted in your group of friends, you need to be someone other than yourself, and act immature/idiotic... you can be involved and talk to people without compromising your maturity, you know. Perhaps your friends just haven't matured yet...
Regarding the middle section of the post, yeah, I agree. People have troubled opening up to people, and letting things fester never solved anything.
Lastly, there's no such thing as too empathetic. =P And your reason for going to university isn't that uncommon... plenty of people find their calling in life in helping other people. ^^ And most fields and careers are all about giving something back to the world... it's only those people who sit back, collect welfare, and do nothing to help the world who are truly guilty in this respect. Everyone else is helping~!
Those people who are just going for the money in a career, like some lawyers, some doctors, usually don't end up happy... because they'll be spending their lives doing something they don't enjoy.