It's a bright and sunny Sunday afternoon. You're watching your favorite childhood movie you haven't see in years. Everything is great with a nice bottle of water beside you. Well, as great as it can be when you have the tv up loud enough to block out two family member fighting. A friend calls and your mum walks up to you and says, "When you're off the phone, we're having a family discussion!""What! What did I do! I did absolutely nothing and it's you two that are scrapping!" You yell inside your head. You can't wait for university. Until then, you decide to call your father and warn him of the situation.
He appreciates the call.
WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE TO FIGHT OVER EVERYTHING THEY DISAGREE ABOUT!*
*This being not all people, btw.
They fight and fight over nothing at all. And they will fight all afternoon until one decides to give up. You pretend to ignore it, but there's really not much you can do with it being the winter and all. So, you just sit where you are and make yourself invisible to the ones that fight.
Why?
That's my question. Why do they feel the need to fight over everything. They know that the fighting hurts the rest of the family just as much as it hurts them. But sometimes they just appear so prideful! They have to be the one to win and, yet, no matter how much they fight no one every really wins and nothing ever is accomplished because of it.
This leads me to wonder. Why do people never let others know when they have an issue (no matter the size) with someone? Instead, say your friend just suddenly became very sullen and stopped talking or laughing because someone said something that was offending. When that friend is asked what's wrong, they'll just say, "Leave me alone." or "You won't understand."
Oh My GOODNESS! Sorry for asking! Sorry I care! You just wanted to know what was wrong or what happened that caused such a change in attitude. And yet, no one will say. Most people won't, that is. If someone has a characteristic that someone else doesn't like and no one tells anyone that, then you have a reoccuring problem there.
People should know. Yes, at first it may sound offensive and hurt, but atleast that way they know. They know that they shouldn't make this reference or that action or act in this way. Things run smoother that way if people will just listen.
Listening. People so much rather choose to talk and exclaim and remark at everything, but most of the time... they just won't listen. They won't listen to themselves or others. They don't care about how others are feeling. Sometimes, people should PAY FREAKING ATTENTION to the world around them. People are only people. When you say something, they will react to it, the same if they do something. If you don't pay attention when there is a disagreement or notice when something bugs someone else, then you are left with nothing but a bad fight, soured relationship and a greater chance for a reoccurence.
People will say that fights are healthy and are good for people. BUT they can be beneficial if you learn from them and realize the way the other person works in the relationship and how they react to you in an aggressive way. If you don't pay attention to the other person and if you don't quit before things get really bad, there is no point. Fights are not the best solution.
People just need to learn how to freaking speak their mind when they have a problem. Not yell it out for the whole world to hear.
As in ancient Greece, fighting is only good to gain land for a short period of time.
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I pretty much agree with the latter half of your post, completely. Should be noted, however, that just because people want to know something that's bothering someone, doesn't mean they should have to tell them. Obviously there are some friends that you can tell anything to, but not everyone has to know everything about you, and some people may rather keep things to themselves.
ReplyDeleteWhile the sentiment of caring can be appreciated, it should ultimately be up to the person whether they want to talk or not.
I do agree with you that people shouldn't be afraid to talk about their problems, though. ^^
Regarding fighting... well, if people lose control of their emotions, then it does spiral quickly out of their hands, and soon enough they're just fighting for the sake of fighting, as you pointed out. However, -some- amount of confrontation is required to get anything done - after all, remember, bottling stuff up doesn't solve anything. It's just a matter of tempering discussion with rational discourse, and making sure no one loses their cool. As soon as someone starts yelling, things can quickly get out of hand.
People should think before they speak - and ask themselves if what they're going to say is really helpful or relevant, or if it's just a spiteful comment.